Down to the last week...how do you juggle a couple teams? Are you honest with other coaches that you are looking elsewhere too? Do you trust coaches that offer you a position and cut off the rest or leave them hanging? Experience speak to me!

You talk to your kid, find out what THEY want out of it all, put your own thoughts and opinions aside, and go with what they tell you. Trust me it is much easier than micro managing their "career". You'll both be happier in the long run. The right coach for your kid is way more important than the best team. Just my own experience and thoughts. Good luck.

jimulon6 wrote:You talk to your kid, find out what THEY want out of it all, put your own thoughts and opinions aside, and go with what they tell you. Trust me it is much easier than micro managing their "career". You'll both be happier in the long run. The right coach for your kid is way more important than the best team. Just my own experience and thoughts. Good luck.

Good answer.

happyfeet wrote:

jimulon6 wrote:You talk to your kid, find out what THEY want out of it all, put your own thoughts and opinions aside, and go with what they tell you. Trust me it is much easier than micro managing their "career". You'll both be happier in the long run. The right coach for your kid is way more important than the best team. Just my own experience and thoughts. Good luck.

Good answer.

I agree.

Soccerinsanity wrote:Good answer but is it answering the questions about honesty and trust?

I politely let them know that we were looking at other teams.

That should answer itself. Is that part of the learning experience you want your son to get out of select soccer? Lie to avoid making a hard choice or to improve the odds of getting what you want. If a man looks you in the eye and tells you something, shakes your hand, welcomes you aboard and you feel you can't trust him then there are bigger issues at hand than soccer. If you are that distrustful of him why would you want to sign anyway?

jimulon6 wrote:You talk to your kid, find out what THEY want out of it all, put your own thoughts and opinions aside, and go with what they tell you. Trust me it is much easier than micro managing their "career". You'll both be happier in the long run. The right coach for your kid is way more important than the best team. Just my own experience and thoughts. Good luck.

Usually, I would agree, but unfortunately last year we did just that...listened to exactly what our BB wanted even though we had serious reservations about the coach...and had a "less than pleasant" season. I do believe it's important to listen to what our kids say, how they feel, etc., but balance it with how we (parents) feel, what we know, and sometimes just "gut extinct"....wish I had listen that "gut extinct" last year.

Nothing s sure fire, anything can happen. Hope that doesn't happen to
Us! If it does it won't be coach related. Sorry to hear socmom.

OK so singing day is almost here. We are deciding which BB team to pick. We want a team that we can stay for a long time 2-3 years.

Team 1- Team has welcome us in with open arms after the first practice, the coach knows his stuff, but the kids are not top notch players. If we go with him our Kid will most likely play more and learn from the coach as well.

Team 2- Coach said after the first practice to keep bringing him that by July 1 he might be ready to make the team. There's like 1-2 spots open for the team and like 6 kids trying out. The coach also knows his stuff and makes the kids play a style of soccer. The team is really competitive which hopefully might push our kid to work harder and match their tempo. On the down side he will most likely ride the bench allot. Is it necessary for the coach to see the kid more than 2 times? If only 2-1 spots are open where will the other kids go who do not make the team? Are they recruiting the kids that get cut for another team?

From experience what should we do.

easy, coach 1. how does riding the bench a lot help you at all? a year is a long time to ride the bench and a team that has great parents is worth a great deal. think of how much time you will be spending with these people.

mavericks67 wrote:OK so singing day is almost here. We are deciding which BB team to pick. We want a team that we can stay for a long time 2-3 years.

Team 1- Team has welcome us in with open arms after the first practice, the coach knows his stuff, but the kids are not top notch players. If we go with him our Kid will most likely play more and learn from the coach as well.

Team 2- Coach said after the first practice to keep bringing him that by July 1 he might be ready to make the team. There's like 1-2 spots open for the team and like 6 kids trying out. The coach also knows his stuff and makes the kids play a style of soccer. The team is really competitive which hopefully might push our kid to work harder and match their tempo. On the down side he will most likely ride the bench allot. Is it necessary for the coach to see the kid more than 2 times? If only 2-1 spots are open where will the other kids go who do not make the team? Are they recruiting the kids that get cut for another team?

From experience what should we do.

So you're willing to pay $2 to $3K to watch your son sit on the bench and watch other kids play? Really?? Your son is just fine with sitting on the bench? If your son says he has no problem sitting on the bench, you need to think long and hard why he's playing competitive soccer.

jimulon6 wrote:You talk to your kid, find out what THEY want out of it all, put your own thoughts and opinions aside, and go with what they tell you. Trust me it is much easier than micro managing their "career". You'll both be happier in the long run. The right coach for your kid is way more important than the best team. Just my own experience and thoughts. Good luck.

Definitely agree with you on this. It is very important that your bb likes and fits the team/coach. This said I think that SoccerMom gut analysis is a factor but as long as it is not a huge risk from the parents side then the fit/enjoyment of the bb should be the top criteria. IMHO.

mavericks67 wrote:OK so singing day is almost here. We are deciding which BB team to pick. We want a team that we can stay for a long time 2-3 years.

Team 1- Team has welcome us in with open arms after the first practice, the coach knows his stuff, but the kids are not top notch players. If we go with him our Kid will most likely play more and learn from the coach as well.

Team 2- Coach said after the first practice to keep bringing him that by July 1 he might be ready to make the team. There's like 1-2 spots open for the team and like 6 kids trying out. The coach also knows his stuff and makes the kids play a style of soccer. The team is really competitive which hopefully might push our kid to work harder and match their tempo. On the down side he will most likely ride the bench allot. Is it necessary for the coach to see the kid more than 2 times? If only 2-1 spots are open where will the other kids go who do not make the team? Are they recruiting the kids that get cut for another team?

From experience what should we do.

Team 1- BB will play, possibly start, and develop as a player.
Team 2- BB has no chance of starting. There are only 1-2 spots open which means that they have enough players for league play. Your a roster filler. Another 2-3K in the coach's pocket. A good coach won't keep a player that does not have a shot at starting. That is what keeps everyone motivated.
It simple; do you want to brag about the top team your BB is on or have him actually play and develop?

my2cents wrote:

mavericks67 wrote:OK so singing day is almost here. We are deciding which BB team to pick. We want a team that we can stay for a long time 2-3 years.

Team 1- Team has welcome us in with open arms after the first practice, the coach knows his stuff, but the kids are not top notch players. If we go with him our Kid will most likely play more and learn from the coach as well.

Team 2- Coach said after the first practice to keep bringing him that by July 1 he might be ready to make the team. There's like 1-2 spots open for the team and like 6 kids trying out. The coach also knows his stuff and makes the kids play a style of soccer. The team is really competitive which hopefully might push our kid to work harder and match their tempo. On the down side he will most likely ride the bench allot. Is it necessary for the coach to see the kid more than 2 times? If only 2-1 spots are open where will the other kids go who do not make the team? Are they recruiting the kids that get cut for another team?

From experience what should we do.

Team 1- BB will play, possibly start, and develop as a player.
Team 2- BB has no chance of starting. There are only 1-2 spots open which means that they have enough players for league play. Your a roster filler. Another 2-3K in the coach's pocket. A good coach won't keep a player that does not have a shot at starting. That is what keeps everyone motivated.
It simple; do you want to brag about the top team your BB is on or have him actually play and develop?

Sometimes I overlook stuff and make it seem harder than they are. Heres to hoping we all have a good year!

In my experience, coaches will let you know right away if they want your BB. If the need more than two looks, that's not a good sign.

I really believe that a kid should be challenged. If your bb was on a team where he got alot of playing time in the previous season, then the risk of going to a team with better players, in a more competitive environment is worth the risk. Even if your bb is on the bench more, just being in practice will elevate your bb's skills and playing ability. I believe too much emphasis is put on playing time, which position your bb is playing etc. If your bb is consistently sitting on the bench season after season, then it is a clear indication to look elsewhere for a less competitive team.

I don't know if I have an answer or should be answering - we just got burnt by coach saying - don't commit to any other teams, we really like and want you - then to be told bam, sorry, changed our minds. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. Bottom line - t's a business and this stuff happens. Am I mad and hurt? Sure -- do I feel bad for my son - even more so. Plus side - he would have been bench sitting and there for the team name mostly. Son wanted that but I wasn't too thrilled to have him bench sitting for that kind of money. Minus side - let me try to pull a team out my wazzo here 2 days before signing. He may not be playing or sitting anywhere now. GRRRRRRR.

In hindsight - playing more gives them more experience. I would be honest with the team, expect them to be honest as well - but also know in the back of your head that it's all a "game" so to speak and to tread lightly and not count your chickens before they are in your hand.

Signed - scorned soccer mom this morning.

(but will be better later - everything is for a reason and it wasn't in the plan apparently)

Best of luck.

SailorMoon wrote:I don't know if I have an answer or should be answering - we just got burnt by coach saying - don't commit to any other teams, we really like and want you - then to be told bam, sorry, changed our minds. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. Bottom line - t's a business and this stuff happens. Am I mad and hurt? Sure -- do I feel bad for my son - even more so. Plus side - he would have been bench sitting and there for the team name mostly. Son wanted that but I wasn't too thrilled to have him bench sitting for that kind of money. Minus side - let me try to pull a team out my wazzo here 2 days before signing. He may not be playing or sitting anywhere now. GRRRRRRR.

In hindsight - playing more gives them more experience. I would be honest with the team, expect them to be honest as well - but also know in the back of your head that it's all a "game" so to speak and to tread lightly and not count your chickens before they are in your hand.

Signed - scorned soccer mom this morning.

(but will be better later - everything is for a reason and it wasn't in the plan apparently)

Best of luck.

Sorry to hear that happened, it sucks when coaches do stuff like this. Good thing is, you have a couple of days to look at some other teams before signing. What age group is bb? Probably find some ideas of teams with spots still here on the forum.

Really sorry to hear Sailor. When a coach gives their word, that should stand. But, your example shows that's not always the case. Good luck!

SailorMoon wrote:I don't know if I have an answer or should be answering - we just got burnt by coach saying - don't commit to any other teams, we really like and want you - then to be told bam, sorry, changed our minds. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. Bottom line - t's a business and this stuff happens. Am I mad and hurt? Sure -- do I feel bad for my son - even more so. Plus side - he would have been bench sitting and there for the team name mostly. Son wanted that but I wasn't too thrilled to have him bench sitting for that kind of money. Minus side - let me try to pull a team out my wazzo here 2 days before signing. He may not be playing or sitting anywhere now. GRRRRRRR.

In hindsight - playing more gives them more experience. I would be honest with the team, expect them to be honest as well - but also know in the back of your head that it's all a "game" so to speak and to tread lightly and not count your chickens before they are in your hand.

Signed - scorned soccer mom this morning.



(but will be better later - everything is for a reason and it wasn't in the plan apparently)

Best of luck.

That is absolutely terrible for a coach to do that to your kid. While it may be just the way it is, I think that stinks for your son. I may not publish the team name on here but you can be sure I would tell every parent I knew about that coach and the way he treated you guys. To be told you are on the team and not to go elsewhere and then to be told the week of signing that he has changed his mind is absurd in my opinion.

I hope you guys can find a team you are happy with in the next few days.

Thanks everyone. That's the thing - coach seemed to be a good honest guy. Very business like and as much as it sucks - it's his job to look out for his team. I didn't go to the last few practices -son drove himself so don't know if that would have made a difference.

We should have been practicing with other teams regardless-- like I said - coulda, shoulda, woulda. Lesson learned.

I just wish he'd told us this last week or the week before -but be that as it may --- not much I can do now but be thankful I have 2 days and hopefully find a team that he can get playing time on. BB is older - last year to play so pickings are slim.

Lots of lessons learned here on this board though. I have a 9 year old and I am so much better prepared for his up and coming "career" because of what I've learned here. I thought I knew a lot anyway - then I came here. Ya'll are great. Good wealth of info.

Heck I found out about his former club folding on here before anyone told me. 3 guesses what club that was!!

SailorMoon wrote:Thanks everyone. That's the thing - coach seemed to be a good honest guy. Very business like and as much as it sucks - it's his job to look out for his team. I didn't go to the last few practices -son drove himself so don't know if that would have made a difference.

We should have been practicing with other teams regardless-- like I said - coulda, shoulda, woulda. Lesson learned.

I just wish he'd told us this last week or the week before -but be that as it may --- not much I can do now but be thankful I have 2 days and hopefully find a team that he can get playing time on. BB is older - last year to play so pickings are slim.

Lots of lessons learned here on this board though. I have a 9 year old and I am so much better prepared for his up and coming "career" because of what I've learned here. I thought I knew a lot anyway - then I came here. Ya'll are great. Good wealth of info.

Heck I found out about his former club folding on here before anyone told me. 3 guesses what club that was!!

Glad to hear that you are positive about it. My bb is in the early stages and I am ensuring that I am keeping very positive with him. It really always does happen for a reason. Another door will open.

my2cents wrote:Team 1- BB will play, possibly start, and develop as a player.
Team 2- BB has no chance of starting...
It simple; do you want to brag about the top team your BB is on or have him actually play and develop?

It might be not that simple as it appears. The question can be said this way:
"Do you want to brag about being starter on the some select team, or have him actually develop?"
Here is our experience.
Year ago our coach decided to drop the team, and we ended up with the team , like "Team 1" here.
Coach knows his stuff, no questions. Most kids are not top notch, mostly average, some weaker, some very talented, but not developed into the stars yet.
My son is keeper. He got all the playing time he wanted, he played 2 or 3 games as forward and scored 1 or even 2 goals. Sounds funny, right?
Do you think we staying with this team?
Correct! We are NOT as well as the most top players of the team.

Main problem was - that average and weaker kids were not willing to practice hard and coach approach was "I am not a babysitter" so not much development occurred during the practice. A lot of "fun" during practices, much more frustration in the games...

So, IMHO, practice with the "strong" team and coach may give your child more, than 100% playing time with the "weak" team.
It is your choice, pay for the good training with the less playing time or
for the playing time with the less training?
Again, depends on Team1 and Team2, may be in your case it is not that extreme as it was in our.
If my BB was "as good or better as best players on the Team1", I personally would choose Team2, because I want team to pull him forward, not keep him back in development.

Again, first of all, if you trust your BB judgment, listen to it. If you don't, and he will not be happy - it will be your fault

Keeper96 wrote:

my2cents wrote:Team 1- BB will play, possibly start, and develop as a player.
Team 2- BB has no chance of starting...
It simple; do you want to brag about the top team your BB is on or have him actually play and develop?

It might be not that simple as it appears. The question can be said this way:
"Do you want to brag about being starter on the some select team, or have him actually develop?"
Here is our experience.
Year ago our coach decided to drop the team, and we ended up with the team , like "Team 1" here.
Coach knows his stuff, no questions. Most kids are not top notch, mostly average, some weaker, some very talented, but not developed into the stars yet.
My son is keeper. He got all the playing time he wanted, he played 2 or 3 games as forward and scored 1 or even 2 goals. Sounds funny, right?
Do you think we staying with this team?
Correct! We are NOT as well as the most top players of the team.

Main problem was - that average and weaker kids were not willing to practice hard and coach approach was "I am not a babysitter" so not much development occurred during the practice. A lot of "fun" during practices, much more frustration in the games...

So, IMHO, practice with the "strong" team and coach may give your child more, than 100% playing time with the "weak" team.
It is your choice, pay for the good training with the less playing time or
for the playing time with the less training?
Again, depends on Team1 and Team2, may be in your case it is not that extreme as it was in our.
If my BB was "as good or better as best players on the Team1", I personally would choose Team2, because I want team to pull him forward, not keep him back in development.

Again, first of all, if you trust your BB judgment, listen to it. If you don't, and he will not be happy - it will be your fault

I know what team/club you bb played for last yeas and we left for the same reasons. At this age it is more important to be on a team that allows your boy to make an impact. While gathering metals and trohpys is cool, it won't matter to college coaches if he can't play at a higher level. And at this age, college scouting is important.

i disagree your son played, touched the ball alot and didn't waste a year with a coach who thought that the bench was the extent of your sons skills. yes you are finding a new team but your year wasn't wasted.....

I think every team is different but why can't a player continue to develop on a team that he gets more playing time on? If a player commits to a lower level team and that coach continues to focus on fundamentals and game tactics a player will get better if they put the practice time in. I have seen players who continue to try and play up at a higher level that are so out classed they actually regress or stagnate.

As my BB gets older i have noticed the talent level between Classic and Plano has really started to muddy. And I think with the emergence of Pre-Academy you will see even more parody between the the leagues. Don't get me wrong, there still will be more good players in Classic than Plano and Arlington but not to the extent of the past. My two cents is find a coach that shows he focuses on fundamentals and look for the playing time.

Bagman00 wrote:I think every team is different but why can't a player continue to develop on a team that he gets more playing time on? If a player commits to a lower level team and that coach continues to focus on fundamentals and game tactics a player will get better if they put the practice time in. I have seen players who continue to try and play up at a higher level that are so out classed they actually regress or stagnate.

As my BB gets older i have noticed the talent level between Classic and Plano has really started to muddy. And I think with the emergence of Pre-Academy you will see even more parody between the the leagues. Don't get me wrong, there still will be more good players in Classic than Plano and Arlington but not to the extent of the past. My two cents is find a coach that shows he focuses on fundamentals and look for the playing time.

I think the most important thing is to have an honest evaluation about what your kid is capbable of. If he is having a hard time getting playing time on a D11 team, then I doubt he will play much in a D1 team. And in that case, the practice with good players, sit on the bench during games philosophy will probably not help much. I could be wrong and I am sure there are kids that went from sitting the bench on D11 teams to being D1 players, but I think it is rare.

The other issue I see is lots of parents keep talking about wanting their kid to develop. What is the point of development on a great team if the kid never gets in the game? I see this as a venture of 80% fun and maybe 20% trying to see what potential he has and if a coach or team can make him better. And the way I see it, sitting the bench on a great team is no fun...

WRG wrote: I think the most important thing is to have an honest evaluation about what your kid is capbable of... If he is having a hard time getting playing time on a D11 team, then I doubt he will play much in a D1 team. And in that case, the practice with good players, sit on the bench during games philosophy will probably not help much.

D1 and D2 are very relative terms here, as we all know some of the D2 teams may beat some of the D1 teams on any given day. Let's say D1 is strong team, and D2 is "not that strong" team.

In this case, can D2 "bench warmer" transform into D1 starter just by moving from the team D2 to team D1? ... the only way I see this happen if there is a conflict with the coach.

What about opposite? Will decent D1 player benefit from moving to D2 team for 100% playing time? I don't think so...

The best scenario would be - all players in the team are on the similar physical and mental level with the similar attitude toward the game. In this case coach can easily develop the team and the players.

So, honestly evaluation and finding matching team is really important.

WRG wrote: The other issue I see is lots of parents keep talking about wanting their kid to develop. What is the point of development on a great team if the kid never gets in the game? I see this as a venture of 80% fun and maybe 20% trying to see what potential he has and if a coach or team can make him better. And the way I see it, sitting the bench on a great team is no fun...

IMHO, option of practicing with a great team gives you chance to play with the great team next year - this team or another. Staying with average team takes that chance from you.

If this is only about fun, then why competitive soccer? You can go rec and have %50 of playing time no mater how you play. Or just play street soccer with the friends ( which my son does often anyway

My view is that competitive sport is for competitive people.
For those, who finds more fun in competing and winning, not just playing.
And to achive that, they are ready to practice hard ( which is not always that much fun in 100 degrees ) and for this they need teammates who thinks alike.

I hope everyone finds his own team and coach

Keeper96 wrote:

WRG wrote: I think the most important thing is to have an honest evaluation about what your kid is capbable of... If he is having a hard time getting playing time on a D11 team, then I doubt he will play much in a D1 team. And in that case, the practice with good players, sit on the bench during games philosophy will probably not help much.

D1 and D2 are very relative terms here, as we all know some of the D2 teams may beat some of the D1 teams on any given day. Let's say D1 is strong team, and D2 is "not that strong" team.

In this case, can D2 "bench warmer" transform into D1 starter just by moving from the team D2 to team D1? ... the only way I see this happen if there is a conflict with the coach.

What about opposite? Will decent D1 player benefit from moving to D2 team for 100% playing time? I don't think so...

The best scenario would be - all players in the team are on the similar physical and mental level with the similar attitude toward the game. In this case coach can easily develop the team and the players.

So, honestly evaluation and finding matching team is really important.

WRG wrote: The other issue I see is lots of parents keep talking about wanting their kid to develop. What is the point of development on a great team if the kid never gets in the game? I see this as a venture of 80% fun and maybe 20% trying to see what potential he has and if a coach or team can make him better. And the way I see it, sitting the bench on a great team is no fun...

IMHO, option of practicing with a great team gives you chance to play with the great team next year - this team or another. Staying with average team takes that chance from you.

If this is only about fun, then why competitive soccer? You can go rec and have %50 of playing time no mater how you play. Or just play street soccer with the friends ( which my son does often anyway

My view is that competitive sport is for competitive people.
For those, who finds more fun in competing and winning, not just playing.
And to achive that, they are ready to practice hard ( which is not always that much fun in 100 degrees ) and for this they need teammates who thinks alike.

I hope everyone finds his own team and coach

Well said Keeper! There are way too many involved (parents) that think it should be about fair playing time and everyone wins. That is what rec is for.